Remembered Love Meditation
Today’s prayer involves two meditative practices to help us feel more connected to those we love in a time of increased social isolation. In the first practice we focus on our living loved ones, close at hand or far away. In the second practice we focus on loved ones who are not with us in person, having passed on. In both, we can surely include beloved pets or other creatures—anything we experience as a someone, rather than a something. In many indigenous traditions, eagles, deer, and other creatures are known to convey a sense of the divine, something we see in Scripture as well but often “under-notice.”
But first let’s remember how normal it is to feel another person’s presence even when we may not see them or hear them. A young child will feel calmed by the presence of a parent or other loving caretaker in the room with them—even if the person is temporarily out of sight—as long as they are in mind and thought to be present, the child feels secure. More mysteriously, perhaps we have all had moments of feeling someone’s presence in a room before we consciously knew they were there. And, of course, it’s a very real presence that occurs when we call someone to mind, when we remember them. After all, everything that we experience, in a sense, takes place in our minds. In both practices, we activate our memory to be aware of the presence of loved ones, and memory includes the capacity we call imagination, which is also, by the way, a key component of faith, since faith is the assurance of things hoped for.
For each practice, you can focus on the beloved others in the way that is most helpful for you. Sometimes calling their name to mind, invokes a sense of their presence. Or calling to mind a visual image of the loved one. Or any other remembered physical sense of the person: touch, smell, a particular facial expression, a laugh. However, it may be that you most readily call someone to mind, focus your attention, in particular on the positive feelings connected to the loved one. It’s not so important to have a vivid memory as to call notice and savor any positive feelings, however subtle they may be—warmth, security, comfort, delight, admiration, and so on—to and to rest your focus on those feelings.
In Hebrew Bible, there is no such thing as “mere memory.” Instead, memory is understood as a re-participation in the event remembered.
So for the first practice, let’s take inspiration from the author of the letter to the Ephesians, who wrote to them from some significant distance away, and said this: “For this reason, I have not stopped giving thanks for you…remembering you in my prayers” (1: 15–16). When this writer missed the people he loved, he remembered them in prayer, in a meditative space.
And now, take a few moments to center yourself. Feel the weight of the body in contact with the chair, for example, and focus on the connection between your feet and the floor. Simply notice the weight of the body. Now pay attention to how the body feels beginning with the head—the face, the ears, the jaw, the back of the head…scanning down to the neck, the shoulder, the upper arms and chest, the lower arms, hands, and midsection…the upper legs, knees, lower legs, ankles, and feet. If you haven’t already, shift your focus to the breath—how the air feels as it enters the body, how the body expands, and how the body softens as you breathe out. If you like take a nice deep breath or two.
And now call to mind your loved ones, near or far—you could focus on one in particular, or a few, or call to mind several, whatever you like in whatever way comes naturally. And remember to focus your attention, over the next full minute on any positive feelings that may arise as you do this. Go ahead.
For our second practice, we take inspiration from the anonymous (to us) letter to the Hebrews, chapter 12, who reminds that “we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses.” The image here is of a race or other contest, in which we are engaged, and we are observed and cheered on by a surrounding cloud of witnesses.
So now, if you like, call to mind any loved ones who have passed on. These can include family members, friends, as well as beloved pets…or historical figures that you feel connected to with feelings of affection and admiration. You can focus on each one, calling each to mind…and then simply relax into the awareness that you are known, loved, noticed by those who are held in the embrace of the love that transcends our limited space and time frame, those who inhabit, we might say, the eternal present. Over the next minute, go ahead.
Very good. And now hears these words of blessing, ascribed to Aaron the high priest who entered the holy of holies—that place on earth that was understood to be a thin spot, an intersection between material reality, space and time, and whatever transcend it.
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
May the Lord’s face shine upon you and be gracious to you
And give you peace. Amen
Go in peace, wash your hands, love your neighbor, you are not alone.